i think that the two of you need some counseling because you are not on the same page about this. also, the sister needs to butt out of this as well. as you know that she's a manipulator you must be careful what you tell her (and you don't tell your spouse's sister something serious and think that it won't get back to him…no matter how friendly the two of you are, 9 times out of 10 blood is thicker than gold and and her loyalty will be to him, not you) if this issue is allowed to fester, it will turn to other things. right now, this is the tip of the iceberg. if you get pregnant and you don't want to be, you will end up resenting him for it and feeling trapped as well.

I think he was angry when he said that, you did say you were fighting.
I am guessing he would like a son.

My wife wanted a third child and I really didn't but I wanted to make her happy. It has not been void of some resentment though, and certainly wouldn't be in your case either.

Every pregnancy is not the same, another one could be easier and it does sound like two children is the common ground.

I would wait until you have your marriage more stable first though (less fighting, more discussion) but at the same time I much preferred having the kids close together rather than spacing it out over years. Get it done with.
You can use this as a negotiation point as well *as long as* you mean it; don't make a laundry-list of excuses.
e.g. we need to take better care of and do a better job handling the responsibilities we have with our current child before I want another one. We need to reconnect more first before we introduce the stress of rearing another infant.
I'll agree to a second child if you agree with a tubal-ligation (or maybe a vasectomy) after-wards, boy or girl.

sorry you have to go through this.
bringing a child into this world take two to make( usually lol) and two people to decide and be Happy with that decision.
i think that his sister put abit of pressure onto him. its not entirely his decision you carry that child give birth and mainly look after it and go through everything else a new mother would. just put your foot down and tell him your not ready to have another baby now maybe in a few years if it comes down to you guys divorcing well let it be it.
if he threatens you with divorce tell him to go jump dont give in to a baby that way he will know he will always get what he wants. ome people especially men dont understand what we woman have to go through its easy for them just make it and woman does the rest. people dont think before bringing children into the world thats the saddest thing, i think.
good luck hun xxx

It's like women who want to get married but their men don't. Same scenario. He needs to realize that pushing you into procreation isn't going to be good for ANYONE … least of all the prospective child.

talk to him!

Hi,

I think that you need to sit down and talk with your husband. Tell him that you are afraid of having another child because of the incident that happened in your last pregnancy, and feel that at this time you are not ready. I would explain to him that you are happy in your marriage with him and that you are content with the way things are going. Assure him that in the future you may be willing to have another child (if you want to), but at this time you are not ready and that he should respect that. I would also ask him if his sister has been talking about this to him, and if she has that she needs to mind her business. It's none of her concern. Anyhow, I hope this helps you. Don't feel pressured to do anything that you don't want to, and if he is trying to force you and intimidate you with a divorce then so be it. You know whats best for you right now so don't let anyone take away your happiness:)

The two of you should really get into therapy.
The worst thing that can happen to a child is to be born with a *job* — and if you have this second child just to satisfy your husband's wishes it would be the absolute wrong thing to do.
Good luck, Sweetie!
xoxoxo

I really think you two should consider counseling. Just stay on your birth control. It wouldn't be fair to him either if you wanted more and he didn't. Tell him this is a decision for the both of you to make, not one of you. Tell him you might want another one in a few years, and you might not. Tell him to be grateful for what he does have.