Nov 07
Ways to get Your Ex Back
Ways to get Your Ex Back
If you have just broken off with your ex and you want him or her back, I’ve got good news and bad news. The bad news is there is just no fixed formula for how to do it. But the good news from your point of view is that there is certain reliable principles that when adopted work like magic each and every time. So what are these principles and how do you apply them?
Firstly, there is the idea of wanting what you cannot have. It is human nature to desire what someone else has that you don’t. For this reason, you must take a step back from your ex. This allows him or her to look at you from afar and in a new way. But what you must do is to change. You should look to improve yourself in the areas where you perceive yourself to be week, paying close attention to those areas that you think were responsible for your break up. Focus on being the best person that you can be. Also take the opportunity to make some new friends and catch up with friends you have not been in touch with for some time. The purpose is to enable your ex to see the improved version of you having many friends who find you friendly, fun to be with and attractive. This is not to make your ex jealous but simply to improve yourself so that you feel better about yourself.
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Secondly comes the principle of meeting emotional needs. One of the singly most important things that keep a couple united is being able to complete each other’s emotional needs. Obviously, the emotional needs of men are different from that of women and each person’s emotional needs is unique but let me share with you the primary emotional need of every man and woman. This is tue, no matter what kind of man or woman your ex is.
The primary emotional need of a man is respect. Respect entails honor, admiration, esteem, being looked up to etc. So if you want to get your ex back, you must show that you are the woman who can meet his emotional needs especially for respect the way that no other woman can. You should never try to make him look bad or even put him down in public. You should the occasion was to complement him, congratulate him, encourage him and sing his praises especially in public. This will endear him back to you. It works like nothing on earth, believe me.
If you are a guy, the primary emotional need of a woman is security. Security involves love, protection, relationship, companionship, being there for her etc. To win your ex back, you need to find ways to make her secure. You should always reassure her of your love (after you win her back, that is), show her that you are strong especially when under pressure, honor your commitments to her, do things for her (especially those she finds difficult or inconvenient to do) and spend quality time with her. This is what will bring your ex-girlfriend back to you.
So when you have taken some step to change yourself, you can start to concider some plans on how to meet up with your ex. Find the right moment when you think he or she would be most receptive. Just ask your ex for a casual meeting, say for a quick lunch or a drink after work. If there is some sort of special event that is going on, maybe it would be a good idea to ask you ex if you would like to join you there. It will probably be better to try and go out as a group. The idea here is to allow your ex to see the ‘new’ improved you and to have a really great time with you. Do this a couple of times, but do try to ensure that it comes off as being natural. Do not try to put pressure on your ex into doing anything. Whenever you are with each other, deliberately look for ways to deliver your ex’s major emotional need. Do so as often as possible. Soon your ex will notice the changes in you and will be touched by your actions to meet his or her emotional needs. This will put your relationship on track to be restored. If you play your cards right, your ex will be back with you sooner than you think.
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